The media in 20 years

Tom AppleTon looks into the future

In Australia, in these days, the last remaining intellectuals – or at all of them trying to imagine how the media could look like in their country in 20 years. Ha ha ha. An optimistic vision.

In Germany, I can not imagine the media in 20 years. Maybe in 2020, you had a clearer view. As an example, one can think of the Schroder government as she once presented its Agenda 2010. With the media lug: in the long run, everything will be fine. So now, the realistic switching, short term: everything is still crappy.

The first and most important prediction: the Suhrkamp publisher becomes natural not Launch. He will be obedient to Springer and any troupes will be daily with the Spruhdose to the Turze: "Expropriated suhrkamp."

Star (so) and time (even so, both small and fat) will continue to exist, and forgive the Lorenzo prize for salaryful chestnutalism. (The pronunciation and occasional spelling "chicanalism" will have embarrassed until then, the word "embarrassed" will have been crouched.To)

Telepolis will have given up the race with the tongue with the tongue, and as a telepostille three times the week digs digitally into the house (with one "bing!" In the electronic mailbox) – a collection of comments at all written articles, publishing motto, finally also lowered: "Your freedom of expression is important to us."

Taz will be a tail, Friday will be a Sunday … never, and so on. And as once at the wall one will mean, picture never passes until … but again unadorned (SO) event occurs. The flood in 2020 floods the whole Springer publisher. Unresponsce, out, over, velvet the former GDR, then as a prolonged Baltic Sea, quasi nameless. The already escaped population no longer needs to be decided. And the not just deep swamp grater, invalidable, is offered with – from the biotope florida – flat boats with jerk-friendly giant propeller for adventure travelers. Dresden see with snorkel in the mouth. Waterworld Leipzig, Underwater Lawn with Real Sachsic Audio Comments in Waterproof Earl Knob.

In 2020 Angela voluntarily resigns ("Make your dirt alone, my place in history is sure") – And there is absolutely no newspaper that puts the letters, because at the moment a high-year bus miracle can be buried on TV with 3D … Miss Germoney – Sorry, that had been. Of course there is no more money, but the tits are yes – thank you for chosening Volkswagen! – for free. We say Miss Ger-Molly. An old word from the Sixties, re-retract.

The short press … ZIP your lips. At the moment I get every evening "NZZ in the morning". This is the flagship of the Swiss Journalaille, I write this only here because it was now, today, still people could give, in German land (and overhead), which is already something of the "New Zurcher newspaper" have heard. But what if someone reads this in 2020? "NZZ, what’n the?"

Oh, I’m mistyped. The term Journaille, says Wiki, in this Hasing Helvetica’s typeface, which has always going on the spirit elsewhere, quote: a (frenched) German word for two things: for the entirety of the journalists (especially for the Part of them working in the boulevard press) or For the entirety of the journalists, the slanderous (Z.B. Scandalizing, downgrading) messages or half-truths spread. They act irresponsibly, sensational hungry and / or . In individual cases you also have or. political motives. The word is used with equal importance for those in this way. It is one of the beginning of the 20. Century according to the word . It means as much as Press Test, Press Pack. The expression of .

Well, and so on. I really meant only "The flagship of the Swiss newspaper fleet". Who writes there, belongs to the Capitans team of the country. Oh, and what was that for a funny newspaper. Once in May: a gray text in a conservative typeface, nowhere a photo, neither S / W even more colorful! But really, Dah-Da-Da Dah Da-Da, All The News That wants to fit in. Today I can find in the three products that you can survive for free as an appetite happiness, three times briefly. The One Minute Silence, How to call that in English, a brief interruption of the conversation, during which one lies over the pages with the eyes. I need the NZZ? There’s the picture newspaper so good. Since the Swiss world week is better. Your online version offers the entire program – but only your subscribers. The others must remain drabs. Does not matter, because the World Week is now pretty bad to the right, because the whole thing does not read anymore. Unleggest I managed to read an article from Wolfram Knorr online online. He discussed a book about the group 47. I have read it now, this book. and I Found it funny. Funny, revealing and important.

But here we have Mr. Knorr, one of the most amusant writer at the World Week. His archive includes hundreds of articles. A great man. But what happens? He is getting old. The new Audi must be paid out. The new publisher switches the leaf sharp to the right. And so you write then, sharp to the right, hard against the left. Unfair actually, because the left do not do that either. Apart from the fact that there is no left more in the media and so. Whether Switzerland, Austria, Germany, the German-speaking press is pretty marble marble today. Hi how? The word has a ban? but To write If you still have to be without PG? So, then I’ll say it – amusing For example, is the press review of Deutschlandfunk, a findelatire in real time.

The World Week was naturally never left. But at least, she was the first to have a complete imprint of Danikens were the gods astronauts? brought. A cheerful summer insulation. And she made the trend popular, a few years ago, that instead of good press photos brings colorful comic drawings. Those who are now looking for in German newspapers from FAZ to SZ there regularly on the first page gross illus without actual cartoon or declaration value. Just drawn nice, colorful. Entertaining. Motto: "We are not a newspaper more. We want to be a comic."

I naturally know that from lifelong observation of German comics. It will never give it. There will never be an untrusted ratio between German readers and German comics – and there will never be a good German comics draftsman. I was really all the German media products velvet and special totally schnupp, if there is at least really a great German comic gift. A Spirou and Fantasio from German fabrication. But just that is missing. Since it has once given an Erika Fuchs, and since then all cultural journalists of the ericative, like an erect penis, is in front of the nose. Shrivel. There has also been a Wilhelm bush, and oh, what you often have to hate or read from Bosen / Children. But there is no one and nobody reads. Then it has the much more funny and better drawn in America Catjammer kids given, and you finished, anyone! YOU’RE WELCOME! In Germany! A SINGLE! – was coming to the taste to help this series in Germany for permanent popularity. But nothing.

The media in 20 years

A good book must be easily digestible.

Afterwards you can watch on the Internet under the keyword "Kauka" after. Tell me one, "I do not look at Nazi pages on the internet." I do not say, I say; I first realized than from the "Jews Goscinny" The speech was that there is a Nazi side operated. So this operator said, Rolf Kauka had made the better asterix in Germany at that time, only just the "Jew goscinny" Had it forbidden him then. Well: Kauka is dead, and kiss the hand hawky woman, he was the German Walt Disney, quite certain. Do not trouble yourself. To German: Do not complain. But Miese German comics are rather the rule than the exception. No matter what the story is, no matter how drithing the drawings, the lettering, and all the above, the main thing, the Moses is clearly recognizable and has the right semelorm form.

How this will look in 2020? Still lousy. Only, not printed on paper, but only on the internet, only from Russia, only with Po Po porno. German comic artists will not give it any more, comic art no longer.

The book as a paper object, as well as the newspaper, the magazine, the comic, will no longer exist. The analog media, paper, cassette, USB stick, all of which could still be handled by the individual, from the private individual, from the historical subject, to be counteracted, become the corporate cloud soft. The autonomous burger, that building block of democracy, becomes the media completely wrapped and multi-tached reception circuit of the economic democracy, which is called, a semiconductor of those autonomously switching and worn economic sphare, which is like such "the population", "the politic", "the military" etc. only serves to control your own interests.

Already today one can say that a newspaper like the NZZ or the FAZ only serves the interests of this sphare; that it is already completely overflowed today, whether someone writes for such a newspaper, she buys or she reads. The kiosk as a distributor of such newspapers has been exhausted. You could just look at Muhelos on the accounts "in the clouds" the relevant bank customers are sent. The news aspect that a Prasident Obama once again strongly heated the American weapon’s auft before the banks pull their profits from other divisions has no value for the burger. He will be the layered mouth, even if he bought 5 military super weapons to his "To defend freedom". If the weapons companies go bankrupt, he can go with his dirt bathing.

What stands in the newspapers on somehow messages, or games in feuilletonides is somehow sustainable. Is it already if the time thinks about philosophy? "What is luck?" ask the leaf. "The love dies? And what really means justice?" I want to know that everything. Or not.

I spent once, about 25 years ago, a few weeks in Mainz. There were there, in Mainz, also for carnival time, about three different newspapers. One of them a completely American layout. So, as the goods of the graphic art Detroit Free Press gone and had uncovered everything completely. Now you had put this German newspaper in this American Jankerl. That was about as if you had dressed Julia Roberts in a Bavarian loden dress or a Jagerhut with gamstart. in the "Imprem" stood the names of the editors, all of a doctorate before their name. Since they had now made all high school and maybe studied 10 years, maybe they had made academic holiday at a university in Brazil or Australia, perhaps they had taught the children of Kuwait’s children’s children for four years and perfected their Arabic. And now they had landed here in a journalistic McDonald’s branch in Mainz.

That has to be quite bad. I may have read one or two articles in this sheet. I’m sure it has changed today. In 2020, in Mainz, the other blatter is no longer available. Because then everyone already has his iPad, even if it is not from Apple. Then you can then make the electronic price comparison before you give up the automatic order at the supermarket. And what else was there to read?

"Who provokes", Said Marcel Rich Ranicki, who was just 93. His essay collection from the year 1966 bubbles from zeal, there was still really much to say about literature and east / west and all possible. Now I read an interview, rich ranicki as an old man. It is a crap to be so old. Literature is a dirt. When you could still do it, you did not get enough. Now you stand up every day and think you may be dead in an hour. All life is a little birds. (I quote him here meaning.) So he is as similar as the tungsten Knorr, who finds nothing nice at the group 47.

Well, and Gunter Wallraff becomes the days also 70. All of his critics, I liked that Wallraff is probably the only serious German writer in addition to Peter Handke – Sorry, Handke is Osterreicher – so at all, not in addition to Handke, but at all, quite for himself, the only German writer, whose complete works are still Always complete in printing are tangible. What will make Wallraff in 2020? He will make a report in Sweden. "As I dressed as Peter Handke and grabbed the Nobel Prize for literature in front of the nose."

But weird, it’s just more and more very old crackers remain, whose lives are hardly interested in someone, but the media still bring it. Soon it will give the race, which is still the longest of the two remaining Beatles, as in the advertising for the Duracell batteries. (It does not matter which; it’s enough if you have seen one of these sniffy advertising films up to the end. "Thanks, please give me the pistol now.") When Paul McCartney sings with 93, "Will You Still Love Me, When I’m 94?" the people in the audience scream the pulse drops. But what if it gets ringo? Completely deaf, 94, and on TV he does not pay us, in America the Beatles were so successful only because of him. Now he had paid a kind of Madame Blavatski, John had informed her enviously, he, Ringo, had been the biggest of the Beatles. Everything that Paul had made, only this had been a song. First he always have "Scrambled Eggs, OH How I Love My Scrambled Eggs" sung – a smear. Then he, Ringo, told him he should rather "Yesterday" to sing. And because the man is the real original Beatle, and no one is there anymore, he can tell you what Spab makes him. "And now we are singing. Ringo still his big hit of then, Won’t You Ringo? we! Reside! All! In! A! Yellow … Submarine! Ladies and gentlemen! Ring! The last … Beadle!"

But now seriously: Did you know, that the first Beatles plate in the US at 22. November 1963 appeared, just about that day 50 years ago, as John F. Kennedy was shot? So with such a fact you could spend half a year in the entertainment TV for half a year …

In Australia and New Zealand, and of course also in America, such a state has become everyday life. The flagship of the American Chicanalism is known to be the New York Times. Sometimes you think the NYT is really soother better than the NZZ, but then you think again, even with the NYT is only cooked with water. But how much desperate are the people at the NYT, as, for example, at the time! Since they send me the special offer into the house, from New York after the Far New Zealand. For two weeks the complete sheet online. Not only ten items for nothing in the month, but the whole sheet, complete, practically three months, for only 5 dollars. We just need money, we are at the German. Somewhere we need the coal. Because in America it is like in Russia, the collapse is in front of the door. Will NYT still give NYT in 2020? Come come, what should this jokes. Naturally not.

And now here the time:

Sold for 5 weeks the time for only € 13.50, and save them 40%. Included is the 48 pages strong philosophy special. Your Gift: The Elegant Cerruti Full Feather Holder Or The Time Clock »1946«.

The people at the time have only not the seriousness of the situation correctly. It’s natural by 2020. "What is actually philosophy? And why do I need a wristwatch in 1946?" – "Shut up."

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